Speech by Sabina Higgins at the launch of the Offaly Domestic Violence Support Service Exhibition and MAN UP Campaign
Tullamore Library, Co. Offaly, 31st March, 2015
I am delighted to be here with you this evening and thank you Anne Clarke for the kind invitation. I would first like to congratulate the Offaly domestic Violence Support Service for their decision to be part of the National Man Up Campaign which seeks to raise awareness of domestic violence and abuse in Ireland.
It gives me great pleasure to launch their part of the Campaign.
I should also take this opportunity to congratulate Safe Ireland for the, launch yesterday of their report, ‘Lawlessness in the home’ executed for them by Simone George and my hope is that it will lead to an improvement in the urgency and the seriousness with which violence against women is dealt with by all of those concerned – Gardaí, solicitors, judges and that it will lead to improvements in such obvious areas as that of family courts and the protections that are needed for women suffering from domestic violence.
Little children being cared for and loved are naturally so confident, so secure and yet so vulnerable. The anguish that one feels at the thought that this trust they all feel in the goodness o life and their self esteem should ever be attacked or betrayed is immense. It is horrific to think too of a young person being a victim of bullying, of having their self esteem being chipped away at, to the point that they lose self confidence and become depressed.
When I visit schools with the President and see glorious young people so beautiful and so expressive I just want them all to have a great enjoyment of life and I cannot bear to think of this enjoyment being taken away from them by the stupid bad behaviours of some other person through bullying or abuse.
Yet the evidence is there, in one report after another that this is happening on a regular basis lovely young people are subjected to bullying and abuse. We have young people being bullied to the point of suicide. We unfortunately have new forms of abuse through the new technologies. What a tragedy it is to think of a new and powerful technology of communication being used to destroy lives of young people.
International research shows that new forms of gender violence are tragically emerging among young people, with new media forms, for example, being used to increase pressure on young people to submit to abusive and bullying relationships. There is also a reported rise in non consensual sexual activity among young people.
We have come a long way, in Ireland and what is both welcome and overdue, is our capacity to address publicly these issues, as matters of collective concern - the issues of domestic violence, sexual abuse, sexual violence and non-consensual pressure.
Thanks to the determination of so many women’s groups and others, domestic violence and sexual violence have progressively acquired the levels of progressive recognition that they deserve. Victims are more willing in recent times to come forward and seek support.
Rape, sexual abuse and domestic violence are now acknowledged for what they are – that is, crimes of the gravest sort. Yet the number of incidents recorded across Ireland attests to the persistence of these crimes. We must continue to use every means we have at our disposal, to tackle gender violence, to prevent, expose, and redress the devastation it causes to the lives of too many women and children. We must do everything we can, to ensure that these women and children are enabled to emancipate themselves from the effects this violence has on their entire existence – try to ensure that they are enabled to lead and do their best to recover lives where personal integrity, hope and meaning are restored.
We need to help young people to develop self-confidence, and an ethical sense of their own self worth and that of others – of their own authenticity so they can enjoy their leisure without intimidation and psychological or physical abuse. They must be encouraged to experience the power to feel free to choose, to give refusal or positive consent, to and within, any relationship. It must be positive consent.
I think the inclusion of philosophy in the educational system would help them to learn to think consciously and develop their moral and ethical authority, to express and defend their values, and make their arguments positively and with confidence.
It is alarming and a cause for great concern that gender violence and domestic violence are so prevalent in Ireland. It is hard to take in that almost eleven and a half thousand women and children received support from Domestic Violence services in one year alone, and that in 2013 over 46,000 helpline calls were answered, that three and a half thousand requests for emergency refuge accommodation went unmet, because the refuges were full.
It is clear that real and urgent attention has to be focused on this problem. It is clear, of course, that gender violence is an international problem and it is also clear that only with active participation of men can the problem be successfully remedied.
This is why I was so happy to know that the Man Up Campaign by Safe Ireland which is in its 3rd year is extending its effort throughout the country.
The largest EU survey on domestic and sexual violence carried out by the EU Fundamental Rights Agency, published in 2014 showed that 394,325 women in Ireland have experienced physical or sexual violence by a partner or non-partner, and that, tragically, 1 in 3 women reported experiencing some form of psychological violence – it is hard to grasp that this tragedy is actually taking place. All this reported research shows that we must think seriously as a country and in communities as to what action needs to be taken to stop the unnecessary pain and suffering that is being inflicted on one part of our people by another part of our people. Tragically too it is the case that it is ignorance, stupidity or backwardness that leads a person to violate their own human dignity, by violating another person’s dignity.
We can instil in children, and in young adults such an awareness of their own dignity and self worth that they can cope with their personalities, develop character, and make a commitment to ethical behaviour, and never resort to violence on another person.
I actually think myself that if Yoga was taught and practiced in primary and secondary school it would help the development of self control and management of anger and frustration, and that it would help people be able to take responsibility for decent behaviour.
I think too that one’s family and education has a great role to play – in building in children a consciousness of their human dignity, and the respect that is due to them, and is due by them to every other person – giving them an awareness of their right not to be bullied or insulted; a confidence as to what to do, and how to speak up, and get help, if they or others are being bullied or abused or belittled.
Parents and teachers too, of course, need to be helped to be aware of when their help is needed, and how to give that help. Young people have so many pressures on them from all kind of media sources and influences where the lines between what is and is not good healthy sexual behaviour is blurred that they do need to be given the tools to be strong, to be critical, and to be able to discriminate and discern what leads to good character formation.
I think the Man Up Campaign can have a great influence. The more young men in all walks of life, the well known personalities in sport and other areas where they are role models, who become aware and speak out and sign up to the campaign, the better. They will bring awareness to other men of the influence they all can have in combating gender violence.
To Sum Up
Man Up is about men who have a true sense of life, who know that living with dignity means having a real understanding and commitment to gender equality.
It means being proud to positively support women in everyday life, privately and publicly.
It means having the courage to articulate such values. It means feeling morally obliged, and having the courage to speak out against, any insult or abuse or violence they find directed at women.
It means having a sense of caring for people in general, and for women and children in particular, and of showing that care, positively, joyfully and openly with no thought of doing otherwise.
It means becoming aware and informing oneself of the actual dreadful prevalence of violence against women that is present in Ireland and internationally and making a commitment to doing everything one can to change this.
This means making up one’s mind that one will do all in one’s power, and use all ones influence, among friends, workmates, in sporting activities, and in every contact area, to bring awareness to the problem of gender violence.
It means emphasising the importance of showing care and respect to the dignity and integrity of women, to challenging negativity and belittling of women wherever it occurs, by breaking silence and speaking out.
I think Man Up is about spreading awareness among men of the importance of developing good caring relationships with others in society with men, women and children. Man Up will help them to develop such good character and moral authority as will make for the happiness and benefit of society.
Man Up is just one of the initiatives that organisations like Safe Ireland, Women’s Aid, the National Women’s Council, Irish Congress of Trade Unions and others are promoting to deal with those shameful statistics of abusive relationships with women that men in Ireland are engaging in and which demeans all citizens in our Republic.
Meanwhile there is the hope that Ireland will soon sign up to the Istanbul Convention – a Convention that will require it to put resources into provision of services that will give protection and positive outcomes to the women whose needs are not now being met.
To Conclude
This is such a huge issue that one, in this short time, can only touch on one aspect of the problem of gender violence. The problem of the poor and abusive quality of much sexual relationships has to be taken seriously, and remedies must be provided, legislatively and in terms of what is required.
I hope that men of all ages all over Ireland will work for a better future by becoming aware and Manning Up, by joining the Man Up Campaign and I hope women will encourage them to do so.
Finally it give me great pleasure to launch the Offaly Domestic Violence
Support Service Exhibition and MAN UP Campaign.